Fungus on Bread


Amidst the sleeps, we put together some shits and call it ‘life’.

For those who are lucky enough to have a comfy bed, they warm it up, wrap it up and most probably even waste it all up.

Not able to sleep?
Insomnia? Internet connection? Love? Alarm? For a change can it be ‘Passion’ that does not allow to sleep?

The Hot, Lukewarm and Cold
While some are struggling with sleep issues, many others just don’t want to sleep. A 15 year old kid with 8+ years of programming experience is topping the world coding contest leader board while another engineering graduate is struggling to understand a sorting algorithm.


Yeah. That isn’t always the want. Some needs to be served while hot. Serving a lukewarm at cold-in-need isn’t good either. Who teaches all that?

But most life things that pass the ‘hot’ stage are useless. The reality check demands for the button that one never comes easily.

The Periodic Departs
There is a part in us that is dying every day. ‘Play’ will die one day. ‘School is all I do’ will die one day (or dead). ‘College life’ dies another day (or already). ‘Work Life’ dies to retirement. Enthusiasm would die one day. Laziness? Never. Postponing things until the ultimate finale will die too.  The learner? That should never. There is not even a delta small difference between one who can read and doesn’t, and who cannot. As long as we are living, we got to let the unnecessary things and only that die.

Beauty and More, Deepity Deep
Unless, Unless, there is a dedicated time put to something, one can never see the beauty of it. Beauty is not at the outset. It’s not inner too. It’s very deep inside and reaching there takes great time. All prodigious things take time. They need dedication. They need commitment. They come with ‘I am sure you will never understand’ happiness.


Everything matters and that said, nothing matters too. It’s all dependent on where we decide to give time. What’s the use of inspiration when the journey is already made? Sure there is way ahead but why was it not through the way already traversed? When you hear from your dear one telling ‘It’s okay’, smile and say to yourself that ‘It Isn’t. One got to come back real and big. Let’s agree and accept the fact that mediocre isn’t good. No. Not valued.



“Life is a learning space”

The Timely Dreams
Dreams come in various forms. There will be a stage in life where nothing seems impossible. That is why the school autograph books are so special. The constraints come in and reality takes a bite. Right or not, we settle. Settle for less. Pick the obvious and let go the specials. Against all the odds, no, there aren’t any odds. We just create them. When we need someone to blame, we pick and create the odds. Dreams are meant to get bigger with time. They are bound to get crushed. They might get crushed only to grow further bigger.

The Tale, Classic
Opportunities’ is a timeless classic tale. We got to make our life stories special through them. It does not matter how others see it. If it was well utilized, it’s going to bring the showers one day. When they are at hands reach, hands must be full. And oh, there are hundreds available and a patiently explore can color the grey.



When was the last time you celebrated a ‘dark circle’?


Deeper than ‘Deep Down’

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‘I’ here is not ‘I’ like it actually means. It’s more of every kind of ‘I’, if you know what I mean. A very abstract metaphor. It could be a person, bird, bag, rain etc. Anything. Just anything. I am not talking of anything here that is way direct and easily understandable. I prefer to say that it is generalization of several contexts.

I see things that actually I don’t intend to. So does the words. I am not aware of the context so I decide not to come up with any conclusions. I am still happy. Because hey, there are always reasons to celebrate. You restore that in me.

I sleep at times with leaking thoughts (okay, I am full). I need arms that wrap me around to comfort. Those arms that would mean more than anything else in the world and beyond every material comforts. A hug that would be as soothing as a heart connecting lyrics. But it’s imaginary because currently you are beyond physical reach. You are not very far. But far enough from the expectations.

I have desires. They are not infinite or beyond. They are small and reachable. Yet they seem to move far. I want to blame you. I almost want to. I don’t know what stops me. I stop. I know it’s not evil to have small desires.


Sometimes I take bath singing fun songs. That I do because at times bath goes too much of sob and cry. The running tap water saves me from a bunch of things.  Bath is also sometimes a quick negligible routine. You don’t have any role here. I still bring you up and complain/compliment.

I have worries and I have been workaholic. I feel work eats up my worry. It does not happen so. Rather it makes work tedious and worry-some.  I think of you and pretend to assure myself everything is alright.

There is this crowd and the crowd is so complex that it has no representation. But that crowd does not make any sense to me. There is this one tiny thing in that complex and that is all matters. For no reason, in that tiny thing, you are there.

No one heard me cry. No one would understand what I am going through. And it is very basic that no one needs to understand that. It’s not necessary. It’s integral part of me and I decide the flow. I put pretty faces and pace and what not. I tell you everything is beautiful. You smile and say things are beautiful because of you. I don’t want to but I accept. As a matter of fact, I don’t have any argument or proof to come to any conclusion. I decide to agree on certain things with no basis.

I want to be in a zone where there is loud music, woofer and beats that mask every pain. Then I want to forget everything and sing my own song, my own lyrics. I don’t know what role you have there. Just be there.

I don’t know what it takes,
I don’t know how,
I don’t know where it leads,
I don’t know when,
I don’t know what I don’t know,
But I know you and,
You are there.

I very much know that, that ‘You’ is part in me. A part from me. A better version of me that keeps me going ahead. Thank ‘you’. You are doing an incredible job out there.

People Who Make Sense

Warning: This one, comes with lot of commas. Pause there, and then proceed.


‘Completeness’ is not an everyday feeling or may be it does not even qualify as a considerate feeling. Completeness is a temporal expression and it would lose its essence if so not the case. Let’s ask this question ‘Is anything in life ever complete?’ Let’s just leave it there hanging as any further exploration would still be incomplete.

We are not meant to make sense in every universe all the time. A leap of faith longish conversation might be totally a load of crap to the third. Though we paint the picture of everyday life with varying emotions, they seem stupid the very next day.  In an optional debate where we can agree to disagree, let’s pick and point something in specific.

In the random weird world where most times are lethargic and lackluster circumstances, the shoes always mismatch. Sometimes it’s the sock. Then there is tie as well. Handkerchief might be missing or the top is too tight or the color isn’t just right. Like said, we are not meant to make sense all the time.  

Who does? Who makes sense? Who ‘makes’ sense? Or who makes ‘sense’? Making sense is somewhere somewhat associated to completeness. This completeness does not come easily from within. It mostly is an effect and affect from the surrounding we have built. Those we have prioritized. Those, whose words we have made influence our life.

Who make sense,
Hold your hand,
Take through the path,
Where thus far you felt,
You walked alone.

People who make sense are seldom found in our zone of comfort. They are ‘by and large’ randomly shuffled along the corners of the world where we are never expected to look over.

*  *  *  *  *

A meet with the most comforting person, where you barely spoke, still gives the utmost satisfaction; they are the people who make sense. A friend with whom you continue a conversation effortlessly that started months ago; they are the people who make sense. A busy friend, who manages time to talk to you, is the one who makes sense. The one, who understands the words the way you mean it, without being explained, is the one who makes sense.

That one friend, who knows that there is nothing called bandwidth that needs to match, is the person who makes sense. That one conversation where you talk things where they don’t look related to others but you make a perfect sense out of it, is the person who makes sense. The one whom you can trust even with the dark shadow of theirs is the one makes sense. The one who promises to make it, though they know they can’t and still tries to their every best to keep it, is the one who makes sense. That one, who thinks of you in every happiness and otherwise is the one who makes sense. The person who makes sense is the one who knows the real meaning of life and they help in defining it and without them, the definition is never complete. Those, who go beyond priority, they are the ones who make sense. They don’t stand with you for benefits, but instead they stand with you because that makes sense to them.

It will make sense when you know the quality of work is the one that matters the most and everything else is artificial. Nothing is built by only accumulating. It also has a falling downside. Things will make sense when you easily let go the fall-down side. It is sensible enough to know that there are fools around. It makes sense when you know that work place is a work place and give it the appropriate space. It makes sense when you know how expectation works. It makes sense to sit alone at times and think of nothing, still meaning everything to you. It makes sense to be neglected. It makes sense to be mocked. It makes sense to put something which makes sense only to you. It makes sense to ignore the judgemental thoughts. It makes sense to be in the race and run it like you always wished for. It makes sense to give up, never turn back and walk away. It makes sense to step for right.


With a presentation of incomplete list, how much of sense do I make?


Why Write?


Pleasure of the heart or pain in the ass, the harsh reality or a dreamful fiction, magic or logic, love or hate, however and whatever way the list grows, they are one hell of a solicitous thoughts. If there is anything that can amplify the beauty of these thoughts is by, yes, you guessed it right – Writing. Writing is the flow of cognisant thoughts into the paper basket. It’s a cascaded random channel that is rebellious to form a structure.


It’s me (The real me).
When I write, I am being that me,
which I actually wanted to, but could not be

Writing – A Maze.
You could love it because it’s relate-able and beautiful, likewise you could hate it because it’s relate-able and painful. It could be the happiness that just slipped away or sadness that needs to walk away. Mind is a maze or to be more precise a maze with a hurricane. Mind is a scattered stupidity. It’s mean. It’s real.  It’s supportive at times and null at other, all because of a bank of unsaid words. It’s this maze that is struggling to turn into stream of words.

Writing – The Things.
It can be that which made you realize that ‘today is beautiful’. It can be that which made you stare at a thing while you were completely submerged into some other thing. It could be that one momentous mail that you drafted or received. It could be that quick nap you took at work. Or it could not be any of that. It could be the Utopian world that you have always imagined and wanted your people and culture to be.  All those things under the name of happened and did not happen. All of that things, you can write.

Writing – The Emotions.
Writing is healing at times and ruining at other. They can be all and still say nothing. They could be nothing and still be it all. They carry that undivided feeling of foolishness that a man can have. They might not put one through and stay un-supportive. They might not be the wishful things. What are they? – the every swing of unexpressed emotions. They might make one live in a fairy land. They might give the feeling of happiness or take the sadness away. Wait, are they not same? No. they aren’t. That is the beauty of writing.

Writing – A Support.
Writing is a soul with a body, mind, heart and more unknown parts. Sometimes they take wings and fly. They take fins and swim. They also just use legs and walk. Writing can pick the one of hundred things that happened on a day to give it the necessary attention. Writing is a shoulder that one can cry upon. When everything else fails, writing can do the required supernatural. When the moments are in pain, when the heart desires a friend, when mind needs a solace, writing can stand as a strong support system.

When you don’t know what exactly you are thinking,
if you want to be read what exactly you want to say,
you don’t talk!
You write!

Writing – While and Moment.
Some stand long, some make a quick exit. Some create a space and some leave a void. Everything comes with a lesson. Those hidden layers of deep feelings can be uncovered through writing.

Writing – The Chaos.
You write because it is a way to manage the chaos. You write because you can shape your challenges and make it an art. You write because, it makes you write. Question yourself, “what makes you write?” It’s that ‘it’, which you challenge yourself and try to seek. You might end up with some disguised you which cannot be uncovered. It’s a form of inspiration that carries from writers thoughts to readers mind opening up an umbrella of thoughts.

Writing – Is Just Not Words.
They say writing can be magic. Trust me, they are lying. Writing is divine. It is the beauty that one wishes to see, feel and experience.

A word of caution though, “Don’t write!” It might spoil you. It might make you feel and appreciate the love and surrounding of you. It might make you feel the heaven on earth, masking the cruel reality. It might give the best of all and worst of none. Or might give you the best of worst and make you ignore the rest of the best. It is not a nature’s creation. It’s not artificial. It’s not natural. It’s you-made.

After all,
you know the answer for the question, “are they just words?



How Smelly Are You?

Note: This is a scheduled post. More Here.


What’s your odour? How do you smell? It is very fundamental to associate a smell to our self because others will do it anyway. If we do not have our own then the one which people associate will become that of ours.  It is very rare that people are going to rate us with a perfume smell. Even if we do a zillion good things, a past minor mistake is enough to give a stinking smell.

Maybe the perfume does not exist. There is only stinking smell. So we should make sure to keep our surrounding away from all the stinking smells. We might not be able to keep that away. But we can sure apply some perfume to our self so that we avoid all those stinky smells. And most importantly we should not expect others to smell us good, if we our self are stinky.

Here is a small story. One there lived a laptop. Wi-fi device was its best friend. It used to bring internet to the laptop. They used to enjoy each other’s company. One fine day a better Wi-fi device was installed and previous one was sold out. The new Wi-fi device and laptop could not be good friends as laptop specifications were low for the new Wi-fi device.

Though there were no issues in bringing the internet to laptop, the combination somehow looked odd. There was a lot of generation gap. Laptop had developed an inferiority complex. Very soon laptop was replaced with a new one and the same person who had purchased the old Wi-fi device had purchased this laptop too. New device had found a new friend and older one got its friend back. They both were happy but however it was not long.

The cycle kept repeating. I don’t want to explain what this story signifies. Very soon the story might get outdated because of generation gap. It is important that we stick to our generation where similar cultures are valued. Else it becomes stinky.

Learning how to converse in a group has always been a challenge. Now things are different. Learning how to listen in a group is also a challenge. Learning how to interpret things and to stay with open mind is also a challenge.  Not taking anything personal is also a challenge. Learning how not to repeatedly point out at someone else mistake is also a challenge. We have many to learn isn’t it??

Dear Society!

This poem was guest blogged in Jyotirmoy’s Blog, Racing Against Time.


One has to study, because neighbour’s kid does,
One cannot dance, because no one near does!
The wealth, the class, the mass, that was,
The discussion of groups, of – such an ass!

While many dreams die, burst inside,
Fire within and chaos the internal,
No one hears the unheard howling cries,
But everyone hears the amplified factual lies!

When one has the competence, other gets to do,
When one cries with skills, other laughs in disability,
Once there is a gender, once there is an age,
Ask me not what stops, there is so much rage!

As the deceased diverges, Intellect shatters,
World looks hideous and the water cries,
Like a half carved statue, undefined shape,
One stands ugly, while the meaning cries.

One got slapped, other harassed,
Another was followed, someone was raped,
One got mocked, other made feel ugly,
Another was back-stabbed, someone was fired.

The cries of pain, heart with dark stains,
For all the things dared, the darkness itself scares.
The regrets are strong, never felt so wrong,
Did not know why, where life seems a lie.

Things never understood, never explained,
Hidden in the smiles are darkness and fear files,
Numerous masks, never no one to ask,
For it is ugly, taking darkness into the team.

Never saw the sunshine, or what it actually meant,
For only could rent, a deathbed just fine!
In the end, came all, looking at the fall,
Only words they sell, “Sleep Well!”

Note: This is a scheduled post. More Here.

The Void – Free Ebook

The void - lr

Behind most kind of ‘nothing’, we all have a story that was once ‘everything’. The beauty of nothingness is that we get completely submerged into it. That is what the feeling of Void is. The V in Void silently says that it encompasses the ‘we’ in it. One is not alone and there is something else with it. May be another person, expectation, object, etc, that kind of else thing.

It’s a short and quick read. It can be downloaded here: The Void.

I am attaching the contents here hoping it would call for a read! If you find it tedious and boring and felt like dropping it in the middle, Let me know! 🙂 I am in the process of learning and that is very much welcome! 

01.The We of V
“I occasionally become nothing; because then I get to be something, every time”

02.Void, Just That!
“Have you ever tried to define ‘Nothing’?”

 03.The Two Ends of Infinity
“I see the ends, that there are no ends!”

04.The Backfire Theory
“Void echoes. What did you put in?”

05.We Don’t know, What We Know!
“Is it Blue? Or Sky? Or Water? Or a Painting? Okay, let’s ask!”

 06.Voids of Detachment
“The thin lines of thick happiness between attach and detach”

07.Happiness is ‘Happiness’
“Self sacrifices are soulful satisfactions! Ehh?

 08.The Drama of Dreams
“Talking about Dreams, Dreams don’t talk!”

09.Like That. A little by Little.
“Curiosity calls Curiosity”

10.It’s Not Like That!
Like u say, like they think, like I know, like that is!

11.Failures? What’s That?
“Failures are only a filthy people’s gossip”

12.The Thoughts That Weigh
“There is no free Lunch. There is no free thought as well.”

13.While I had a Chance
“To Not-To-Do something, If I have a reason today, there will be something stronger tomorrow”

14.The Story of the Broken
“The beauty of fallen is that, It is now rising!”

15.The Dance of the Void
“Can you dance to imaginary beats of time?”

16.The Life Days
“Polish for bright. Not to get blind.”

17.The Table of Merits
“I am mess. So will be my table. My plate. My eat. My see. ”

18.The Duty Call
“I do it as I do. You see it as you do.”

19.Not All Stories Are Told
“We all have stories. The common struggles are told.”

20.The Absurdity
“I love abstractions. It can have addition and subtractions. Okay, A lot of math.”


We talk Rules and Shapes

Indian Bloggers


First the rules are formed and then the shape is assigned. This process makes it inevitable that when the shape is seen the rules are involuntary. The rules are anytime identifiable by the shape revealed.

Say for Example:
When we have visible mass of minute liquid droplets, frozen crystals or particles suspended in the atmosphere above the surface of a planetary body, we call the things that adhere to such rules as ‘clouds’.

Now all that said, have you ever seen a water droplet claiming it to be a cloud? Would you take that service?

This is interesting!
Wearing a white coat does not make anyone a doctor. A monkey cannot call itself a gorilla. One has to understand that there are rules. One has to understand and undergo certain transformation to become one. The process is that: first the properties and then the dressing, that how it goes and it must.  It kind of feels funny if the process reverses its order when the shape is first taken and then struggling through entire life to master the rules.

This applies to everything and every tip and toe that we see. Do I call myself a reader and then read books or do I read and then call myself a reader?

I look back at many things and ponder what was the right way and did I do them right! Do I have the right culture?

The Roads That Never Saw a Good Driver

Indian Bloggers

Do you realize that one can never be a good driver unless everyone on the road is a good driver?

It’s not only about you following the lights and rights but also about everyone else doing it and being extra careful on those who are being blind to it. Does that somewhere with some really good probability mean that the roads will never see a good driver? Yes, possibly that.

Does that mean that roads are always unhappy with that known fact?
Oh, no. They aren’t. They still celebrate. They enjoy the lights and the rains. They enjoy the wheels and the steps. They wear and tear with seasons and get a new coat with time. They always take the new avatar when they get old. They remain neutral to good or bad.

They are not the unvoiced ones. They shine in the light and wet in the rain. They go with the flow and color with the show. They read and see hundreds of stories everyday and still don’t be either judge or mental nor judge mental.

Ahhh! Its’ just not the roads! Do you see how similar it is with us and our lives?